Show Notes
For our second “Best Of” episode, I thought I’d bring you back to an episode where I emphasised that fitness is about way more than just “being fit”. It's about helping women to achieve. It's about accepting responsibility and stepping into your power to create the results that you want, not getting held back by your brain and the beliefs that you choose to cling to. So, let’s dive in.
** Please note, as a “Best Of” episode, some of the links you’ll hear mentioned are no longer active. All currently working links that are referred to in the episode will be in the show notes on my website.
Find show notes at bicepsafterbabies.com/174
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Highlights:
- Question and challenge your beliefs (2:32)
- How you see the world determines what's possible for you (6:32)
- Excuses that keeping you stuck (8:22, 8:49, 24:19, 29:17)
- The quality of your life is determined by the quality of questions you ask ( 12:17)
- Picking priorities and what you value (12: 17, 16:43)
- Living life with conscious intention (18:18, 26:03)
- The feeling of overwhelm is a choice you choose to keep feeling (29:17, 32:45)
Link:
Introduction
You're listening to Biceps after Babies radio episode number 174.
Hello and welcome to Biceps after Babies radio. A podcast for ladies who know that fitness is about so much more than pounds lost or PRs. It's about feeling confident in your skin and empowered in your life. I'm your host, Amber Brueseke, a registered nurse, personal trainer, wife, and mom of four. Each week, my guests and I will excite and motivate you to take action in your own personal fitness as we talk about nutrition, exercise mindset, personal development, and executing life with conscious intention. If your goal is to look, feel, and be strong and experience transformation from the inside out, you, my friend are in the right place. Thank you for tuning in, now let’s jump into today’s episode.
Amber B 0:43
Now you've probably seen the title of the podcast, which is I can't afford it and other excuses keeping you stuck. So I'm back with another hot topic and one that can be a little bit touchy. But I want to discuss this because you know what, dang it, I care about your success. And when you sabotage that success, with things that are within your control that you can change, then, as a coach, I'm going to challenge you on it. And it comes from this place of caring so darn much about your success. And I guess, you know, as I'm going along in this podcast, I'm getting a little bit ballsy here. And I'm not just sticking with some of the easy content that everybody is going to show up and applaud and agree with and love. And so I did on episode number 29, My Rant About Macros And Intuitive Eating. So if you haven't listened to that one, go back and listen. But that was kind of scary to put out there because I didn't know how people were going to respond. Because it's not pretty and it doesn't have this nice bow. And it's not like everybody's gonna agree with it. But I got amazing feedback from that episode. And I realized that you know, what, I have messages to share, I have things that are in my heart that I want to talk about. And when I sit here afraid that I'm going to offend somebody or that someone's not going to like it, it doesn't help me grow, it doesn't help you grow. And so you know what I'm putting the fear aside, and I'm saying the things that are in my heart, coming from this place of I want you to be successful, I want you to win in life, in fitness and everything. And I think when we have these hard conversations, it allows you to grow. And it allows you to analyze your beliefs, and it allows you to be the best person that you can be.
Question and challenge your beliefs 2:32
And yes, one of my goals is to make you think, and to make you question your beliefs, that's a good thing. I think questioning the beliefs that you have written in your mind, as a fact. That is one of the most important steps that you can take, that's going to start to change your reality. If you aren't happy in life, there are likely beliefs that you currently have that are just keeping you stuck. And so I've learned as I've aged and as I've found my voice on social media and in my business, that I don't just want to spout off the same sweet motivational quotes that are, you know, double tapped on Instagram, I want to get to the root of why are you stuck? Why aren't you making progress? And how can we fix that so that you can actually have this transformation from the inside out. And sometimes, that means having your beliefs challenged. And sometimes it means getting a little uncomfortable. And some of the things that I say in this episode might touch a nerve, they might make you uncomfortable. So what I'm going to challenge you to do is instead of just dismissing what I'm saying, I want you to stop and think about why it's making you uncomfortable. We talked about this a little bit in last week's episode with Chrissy King about why something makes you uncomfortable. Why is it like challenging that belief making you feel uncomfortable? And it doesn't mean that it's bad. So often we get into this social media echo chamber that like anything that we disagree with, we just immediately unfollow and we don't want to hear from that person because we disagree. And I'm going to challenge you that no, like, we want to have people that we disagree with, we want to hear different perspectives, because that's how we learn and how we grow and how we evolve as people. So we're going to dive a lot into beliefs in this episode. And we're going to go into it in depth. But right here, I want to say that if you get uncomfortable with some of the things I say or you get upset, it's likely because you have a belief you're holding on to. And here's the awesome thing about human nature and humanity and free agency is that only you can decide if that's a belief that you want to continue to hold on to. If that's a belief that's helping you to get the results that you want. You can choose to hold on to the belief or you can choose to let it go. And the choice of that is up to you. I love this quote that I just heard last week, the quote is “Your mind is like a parachute. It works best when it's open”. Okay, so let's let's dive in. Let's keep our parachutes open. And, let's listen. And I'm not saying that you have to agree with everything that I say. But if it does make you uncomfortable, or it does touch a nerve, I want you to start to think, why, what beliefs do you have that are making that touch a nerve? And is that a belief that you want to keep believing?
What is a belief? 5:25
So I've said this word belief a bunch of times already in this episode. And let's dive in and start with that, like, what is a belief? Because it can be kind of hard to define that word. What is a belief, a belief is simply a thought that you continue to think. And the crazy thing about beliefs in our life is that we don't label them beliefs, we just label them as just, that's just the way the world is. That's just a fact, as something that's a truth to us. Which means it can be really hard to start to identify those beliefs, because they won't show up as a belief for you. They don't knock on your door and say, Hey, I'm your belief. But rather, you're just like, Yeah, this is just the way the world works. But what you have to understand is that beliefs are powerful. Everything that happens in your life is filtered through your beliefs. Your beliefs literally color the world and it creates the perception that you have about everything.
How you see the world determines what's possible for you 6:32
Have you ever had one of those friends who, like no matter what was happening, she always found the silver lining, you know, like a Pollyanna. Like, you know, she'd get in a car wreck. And she'd be like, Oh, but I'm so grateful that, you know, my seatbelt kept me safe. And I'm so grateful that I have the money to buy another car. And I'm so great. She's like going on about all these great things. And you're like, girlfriend, you've gotten into a car accident? Like why are we focusing on things that are great, like, he's had this awful, horrible thing happened to you. But like, that's just the personality. Or on the converse of a friend that was like your, we tend to call them pessimists. I had a friend like this growing up who literally it was like, regardless of what was happening, she was always negative. Like the sky was literally falling out every single time. It's like every situation, she found the negative aspect of it. And here's why this is so important to talk about. Because how you see the world determines what's possible for you. Okay, how you see the world determines what is possible for you. And it's the reason I do what I do. I know that if I can get women achieving in the gym, in their fitness, and they start to see the world as a place where they can win, they start to see the world as a place where they can set goals and achieve them. And they start to see the world in a different light and what's possible for them, it bleeds out into other areas of their life. And I always say what I do is about fitness, but it's not about fitness, it's about so much more. It's about helping women to achieve. And that's what this episode is about. It's about accepting responsibility and stepping into your power to create the results that you want, and not getting held back simply by your brain, and the beliefs that you choose to cling to. So we're going to dive in.
Three excuses 8:22
And I have three excuses that we're going to talk through and chances are, you have thought one of these before in your life. It's not a bad thing, it's not a good thing, it's just you probably have thought of one of these before. So I want to remind you to listen with an open mind and consider how those beliefs that you're holding on to or maybe held on to at one point in your life held you back from what you wanted to create with your world.
No. 1 I can’t afford it 8:49
So number one, the first excuse that we're going to talk about is I can't afford it. And yeah, we're gonna start with the big one, the one that will likely cause most people to get uncomfortable or want to fight with me, this idea of I can't afford it.
Sharing my personal experiences when our budget is so tight 9:05
And before we dive into this one, if you're listening, and you're currently in a rough patch right now, or you've been, you know, financially in a rough patch for a while, I want to give you a big hug. And I want to tell you that I get it. And what I'm saying here isn't to beat you down when you already feel like life is beating you down. I get it because I've been there. My husband and I graduated from college and he went straight into medical school. And for those of you who don't know how the process works, it means we've been poor for literally years, like multiple six figures negative net worth poor like lots and lots of debt poor like six people in an eleven square foot apartment floor. And I worked as a nurse during medical school while my husband went to medical school to pay for our living expenses. But we took out multiple six figures in loans to put my husband through school. And then just to make things more fun, my husband did four years of residency. And then three years of fellowship, where he was paid, but not a ton. And we lived in California, and we had four kids. So yeah, I can budget and coupon like the best of them. In fact, I remember when we were living in Pennsylvania for med school, my weekly shopping trip would consist of going to at least four stores a week, so I could get like the very best deal at every single one. Like I knew which store had the best price on milk. And then I knew I just saw the breast price on you know, fresh fruits, and I knew which store had the best price on bread. And so I would go to each of those stores so I could get the exact breast price on every single item. I clipped coupons. Like I know how to stack a store coupon with a manufacturer's coupon with a sale and get things for free. And like that coupon show that used to be on TV where people would buy hundreds and hundreds of dollars of food for like nothing. Like I did that. That was very much a real thing for me. And I remember like going to CVS and using my extra care box and rolling them over and like almost playing the game of trying to get things for free. I made everything. I made bread, I made tortillas, I made popsicles, I made pizza. Everything was homemade. Even our laundry detergent. i It was the cheapest way like everything for me was like the cheapest way around everything. I never bought food out of fruit during the season. I bought everything at thrift stores like that's where we shopped, I didn't pay for preschool until my fourth kid when we were finally out of training. We lived in very small apartments, as we added a total of four kids to our family. We drove the same van for the last 10 years, which my husband got in an accident less than a year after we bought it. So it has a huge dent on the side. And it has over 200,000 miles and the headline is falling down inside the car and so it's pinned up with tax. Like we're super swanky. So yeah, I get it. Like I know what it feels like to hope and pray that you have enough money to make it to the next paycheck, I've been there. And I'm not downplaying real financial trouble, because for some of you, that's real life right now. And that can be really, really scary.
How you spend your money is and will always be a choice 12:17
So starting with that, I'm still going to discuss the words, I can't afford it. Because those words are very, very relative. One person says I can't afford it, because you look at their bank account, and they literally have zero money in the bank, and they've maxed out their credit cards, they say I can't afford it, because unless they borrow the money, or secured a loan, they literally do not have the money. But that's not everybody. There are plenty of people who say I can't afford it because they don't value the purchase. Meaning if they had to pay $50 for medicine to save their child's life, then they would find it. But $50 for a T-shirt isn't worth it. And here's what I want to say to you: how you spend your money is and will always be a choice. If you have an income and or money in the bank, and you say, I can't afford that. I want you to recognize that you're prioritizing the things that are most important to you, based on where you spend your money. And that is a good thing. Inevitably, whenever I charge for anything, whether it's a program or coaching or a service, I always get people who messaged me saying I can't afford it. And I even posted something in my stories a while back about how if you say I can't afford that, it's saying that you aren't a priority, or that isn't a priority or life and boy, have I never got as much hate mail as after I posted it. To be clear, I got a ton of people agreeing with me about 90% But the 10% who disagreed? Why were they mad? So let's talk about it.
Why “I can’t afford it” is a disempowering phrase 12:17
Let's dive deeper into why I want you to consider the phrase I can't afford it and why I think it's a disempowering phrase. First of all, if you have ever said the phrase, I can't afford it, which let's be clear. I've said that phrase before. I want you to follow up with the question How do I know? How do I know I can't afford it? So think about that. How do you know that you can't afford something? Now you could go into all your bank balances or your budgeting or all the extra expenses you have right now but I want you to maybe consider that that phrase I can't afford it is a belief. What? No Amber, I really can't afford it. You see, my husband's hours got cut because my in-laws are living with us and my son has special needs and I really can't afford it. So I want you to stick with me here because the quality of your life is determined by the quality of the questions you ask. Tony Robbins said that and so this phrase I can't afford? It isn't a very good question. I mean, technically, it's not even a question. But if it was, it wouldn't be a very good one. Because it's like this close statement. I can't afford it, done. What if you switched that to a good question like, How can I afford this? Or what would I have to give up to afford this? Or what recept sources do I have access to in order to get the result I want? Look, not everyone is going to buy everything. And not everyone should buy everything. In fact, can we just get rid of the phrase I should? It's kind of like trying. You know how Yoda says Do or do not? There is no try. I'm going to create a scene that says choose or choose not to, there is no should, like, we don't, nothing is a should in our life. If you don't think something is worth it, then that's okay. Say that. If you think, okay, I could scrape up the money. But it would mean cutting something that's important to me, like paying for my son's preschool or paying for my monthly medication, then it's okay to say I choose not to buy X, Y, and Z because it's a priority for me to pay for preschool, or for my in laws, or for medicine, rather than to buy that. And the key here is to own your decision on it. Don't feel bad about it, don't feel guilty. Life didn't just happen to you, you made a decision. And I think one of the biggest reasons I dislike the phrase I can't afford it is that it's disempowering. Like what a disempowering phrase, it's like, life is happening to me.
Picking priorities and what you value 16:43
And I want to be really clear about something. I'm specifically talking about when people use the phrase, I can't afford it. And then they feel bad about it. Once they say they can't afford it, and then they feel bad, and then they start moving forward. They let it block them from making the change that they want in their life. So they want to lose weight, but they see something that can help them to lose weight, and then they say, I can't afford it. And so then they just don't do anything. Okay. I've said I can't afford it many times in my life. But when I said it, it was done from a place of knowledge that I get to choose how I spend my money. And right now paying rent, and putting food on the table are a higher priority to me than buying those new shoes. And I get to pick my priorities. So think about it this way, you know, the saying, show me where you spend your time, and I'll show you your priorities, the same thing can be said for how you spend your money, it's not good or bad or otherwise, how you choose to spend it. You spend it based on your priorities and what you value. And so when someone says, instead of saying I can't afford it, say it's not a priority, if that gets you all huffy, and defensive, really look at what you are prioritizing in your life, like what you're spending your money on. And if you do that, and you're 100% in alignment with what you choose to spend your money on, then it doesn't cause you any angst when someone challenges what you choose to spend money on. However, if you are out of alignment, and you aren't prioritizing things in your life, that really are the most important to you than when someone calls you out on the fact that you are saying I can't afford it, it's going to make you uncomfortable, and it's going to make you defensive.
Start making decisions on what you want to happen 18:18
Now, I'm almost done with this lie. But this is a big one, which is why I have to spend so much time on it. So the last thing I want you to consider is this. When we say these, you know these excuses when we say I can't afford it, maybe you are stuck in the first place because you are making decisions based on your current circumstances rather than what you want to happen. So I'm going to say that again, maybe the reason that you're stuck is because you are making decisions based on your current circumstances, rather than what you want to happen. Meaning, if you are always living life, based on who you are now, and what results you've created so far in your life, you will only keep getting the same results. In order to change your circumstance or to change the outcomes you get, you have to start making decisions based on what you want to happen where you want to go. So when you say that you are going to buy something because you can't afford it, you're making a decision based on your current circumstances, which is essentially keeping you stuck getting the same results you've always gotten. So what I'm going to challenge you to do is to start making decisions based on what you want to occur.
Thought experiment 19:40
I like to do this as a thought experiment with my students. And I do it a ton in my own business as well. I imagine a version of me who has the result that I want. And I get really clear and present on who I am with that result. And what I'm doing now that I have the result that I want. And then I make choices based on that person and that circumstance. So for example, I told you I had never paid for preschool for my kids. So I have four kids, kids one through three, we did like co-ops, and you know, switching teaching with other moms, and it was free. And then for child, number four, we were finally having an income. And my business was taking off. And I decided that I would put my son in preschool three days a week. And so last year, he was in preschool three days a week. And it was a good experience for him, it was a good experience for me. It worked, you know, all the way around for our family. And so then when time came for me to decide this last year, how many days a week to put them in preschool, and I was presented with the opportunity to join, like another Co Op, that would have been significantly less money. I was sitting here trying to weigh Okay, do I send him to this Co Op? That's a lot less money, but it will require my time. It will require me, you know, going there and showing up and participating in the co-op? Or do I send him back to the preschool that I sent it to work? Yeah, I have to pay more money for it. But I don't have to do anything, right, I just can drop him off. And so I was struggling with the decision trying to make a decision. And I realized that I needed to make this decision based on the results I wanted to create. So what I did was I decided, okay, where do I want to be in my business? What's the income level I want to be? What's the impact that I want to be making? How many people do I want to have working for me on all these things? These are the goals and dreams and aspirations that I have for where I want to be? So I put my mind there, and I said, okay, if I'm looking back, and I've already created these results in my business that I want to create, would I have in that situation? Am I teaching my son's caught preschool? Or am I sending him, you know, to another preschool where I can just drop them off? And the answer was very clear, like, that woman would not have the time or the energy or want to be putting time and energy into the Co Op, I would want to be able to put it into my business. And so for me, the right choice was to make a descent into preschool where I could just pay and have him drop him off. And that was that decision was literally based on not where my current circumstances were in my business, or how much money I was currently making. It was based off of the result that I wanted to create down the road. And I knew that that person that created that result would have made the choice to not get involved in a co-op, which was going to suck up a bunch of my time. And so for me, that was how I made the decision based on the result that I wanted to create, rather than the circumstance that I was currently in.
Be intentional with your priorities rather than saying I can’t afford that 22:51
So all this to say that I want you to consider striking, I can't afford it from your vocabulary instead. And this is what I would rather have you do. First, ask if whatever it is XY and Z provides value to you. And then second, is it a priority? And if the answers are both, yes, yes, it provides value to me. And yes, it is a priority. Now ask yourself the question, How can I afford this? If either of those answers are no. So if either one is a no, no, it's not a value to me. Or no, it's not a priority. And say that, say that rather than this blanket, I can't afford it. And see if that little shift in making a decision and owning it and not letting life happen to you changes the way that you go through life. Because I think it will, I think when you start to say, You know what is a priority in my life right now paying rent is a priority in my life. That's where I'm putting my money right now is paying rent, or paying down debt, or whatever it is. But when you are very intentional about the priorities in your life and where your money goes, then you can say that rather than saying I can't afford closing the book and shutting off all other, you know, questions that you could be asking that could actually get you the result that you want.
No. 2 I don’t have time 24:19
Alright, number two. So the second excuse I want to talk about is the excuse. I don't have time. And I feel like this is a little easier one to debunk simply because unlike money, we literally all have the exact same amount of time in the day, right? Like we all have 24 hours in a day. We don't all have the same income. Even so, I still hear this excuse a lot. And yes, I'm going to be a straight shooter and I'm going to call it what it is unexcused. It's very similar to the I can't afford excuse. Try changing, I don't have time because it's not a priority to me. And then think about how that feels. Does it make you feel icky? Try it. I don't like it, you turn. I don't have time to read to my son, it's not a priority to read to my son. Like, how does that feel? Does it feel good? If it doesn't feel good, then it likely means you need to reassess your priorities and what you spend your time on. For me, it's like, you know, when I say I don't have time to write a book, and I say, I changed that, too. It's not our priority to write a book that doesn't feel icky to me at all. That feels great. Yeah, I don't want to write a book. Okay, so not everything in your life can or should be a priority. For example, I have zero desire right now to make homemade decorations for my house. At one point in my life, that was something that I enjoyed. And I did it, I made Easter decorations, and I made Valentine's Day decorations, and it was something I enjoyed doing. I don't do it now. But when I replace it, I don't have time to make homemade decorations. making homemade decorations isn't a priority for me like I have zero shame, zero guilt. Because it's true. It's not a priority to me, and I'm okay with that.
Living life with conscious intention 26:03
So again, if your natural inclination is to start listing all the things you have to do in a day, to prove to me that you don't have time to exercise or meal prep, or de stress, then just stop for a moment. Because all of those things you're wanting to list to me that you have to do, or currently what you're saying are priorities in your life. And now are you satisfied with what you're prioritizing? Because if you aren't, girl, things need to and can change. And you are the only one who can change them. And this is what I mean, when I talk in the intro of this podcast about living life with conscious intention. You spend your time and your money on the things that are a priority to you. If you aren't currently doing that, then change it. Take control of your life, and change it to align with your priorities. So if you're going through your day in alignment with who you are and what you want to create, you're going to feel good, and it's going to be a good situation. And girlfriend. I know time is tight. I know time is precious. And you know, here's some gentle advice, you can't do it all you can't. So this excuse of I don't have time is something I hear all the time when it comes to macro counting. And I'm calling it out. It's an excuse. You feel afraid to start something and try something new to maybe possibly fail again. So you keep yourself safe and by safe I mean nothing changing in your life, which is another word for staying stuck. And you come up with excuses. Like I don't have an extra hour a day to track macros. Newsflash, it doesn't take an hour a day. Yes, there's a learning curve. But I cross my heart and hope to die and promise you that if you can invest 20 minutes a day, you can be successful counting macros.
Macros 101 28:01
In fact, in my program Macros 101 I have a bonus called macros in 20 minutes a day. Because I know time is tight. And I know you're busy. And I know that you want to make yourself and your health and your fitness goals a priority, but it doesn't mean that you want to give it two hours a day. So like I said, macros 101 doors will open next week, and I'm doing a free class teaching why macros are more important than calories. And then I'll be opening the doors for one week to join Macros 101. So if you want to go to bicepsafterbabie.com/class, to sign up for that free class and learn more about how macro counting and Macros 101 can help you lose weight the way you want without cutting out the foods you love. Go to the link and sign up again, I will once I close down the doors, I will not be reopening them in the fall. So this is my last chance for you to get in. But here's the secret, like macro counting doesn't have to take a lot of time, 20 minutes a day, if you can give me 20 minutes a day, like I can get you tracking macros and being effective and actually seeing the results created in your life and in your body that you want to have. So let's strike that I don't have time from our vocabulary, and instead be very intentional about how we prioritize our time and what we invest in.
No. 3 I’m overwhelmed 29:17
And then the last one that we'll wrap up with, this is the belief of: I'm overwhelmed. And this is a big one as well. The feeling of overwhelm is one that so many women can relate to. But I want you to consider something overwhelming as a choice. Overwhelm as a belief. Did it just hurt a little bit? Me saying that? Because so often when I say that women start getting defensive, and they want to just like present me with this long list of all the activities that they're involved in and how many things they have on their plates, as if to like prove to me like see Amber, of course I'm overwhelmed like look at all the things I have to do. But is that of course Like, would every single person in the world be overwhelmed with that list of things to do? And the answer is no. And that's because the list of things that you have to do is a fact. But the feeling of overwhelm surrounding those things is 100% a choice you choose to keep feeling. Okay?
Difference between feeling and emotion 30:21
And there's a difference, I want to talk about the difference between feeling and emotion. Because there's a slight difference. Emotion is immediate, and it's quick. Okay, so like that knee jerk reaction. Whereas feelings are the things that linger, okay, they stick with you and like, feel them for a long time. And the difference is, that emotions are like knee jerks. And there's not a whole lot you can usually do to control that initial emotion. But there's a ton that you can do to control your feelings, because your feelings are controlled by your thoughts. And your thoughts are within your control.
How does the feeling of overwhelm affect you 30:21
So you're welcome to continue looking at that list of things that you have to do today, and feel overwhelmed. Like that's a choice like you can, you can feel that. But here's what I want you to consider and what I want to offer, does feeling overwhelmed help you? Does it help you in any way? Does it make you more efficient? Does it make you more calm and focused? Does it help you to move through your work, not usually, for most people overwhelm makes them feel paralyzed, and it makes them not make decisions. And it makes them like, just continue to stay stuck because they feel overwhelmed. It's not usually a positive feeling. It makes you feel hurried, it makes you feel stressed. And I know for myself that it doesn't make me do my best work.
What is the benefit of being overwhelmed? 30:21
So then, what is the benefit of being overwhelmed? Because it's also important to understand that every single belief that you have, and that you're holding on to, there's some benefit it's providing you. Okay, that's why you continue to hold on to the belief because it's protecting you in some way. And so if the belief of overwhelm doesn't help you to perform better than what does the belief of overwhelm provide for you? For some people, the feeling of overwhelm gives them an excuse as to why they can't do other things in their life. So maybe it means that they don't have to start writing that book, that's really scary to do, because they can hide around in the overwhelm of all the other things they have to do. Or maybe it means they don't have to take that hard assignment at work that they know is going to challenge them because they can just hide in the overwhelm of all these other stuff that they're doing in their job. Or maybe it means that they don't want to put effort into paying attention to what food they eat, because they can hide in this overwhelming story that counting macros is super hard.
Decision making fights the feeling of being overwhelmed 32:45
Overwhelm keeps you from making decisions, it keeps you from moving forward. And if there's one thing that will fight overwhelm, its decision making, okay, because if you can get out of the overwhelm, and make a choice and make a decision, you can start to move forward. Action creates clarity to my friends, once you can create some sort of action, you'll get more clarity than you will ever get just sitting around overwhelmed. So if you find yourself stuck in overwhelm, think where can I make one decision and start with action? Okay, where can I just make one decision, just one decision right now and start making action. And as you do, the overwhelm will decrease. Also consider how you're thinking about the things that you have to do in your day. Recognize, again, overwhelm doesn't come from the number of things that you have to do in your day, or the number of events you have to attend or the number of anything overwhelmed comes from your interpretation of that list. Is it going to be hard, is it going to be tedious, isn't going to be a lot of work, like the thoughts you have about the list, not the list itself, the thoughts you have about the list are what are creating the overwhelm. So let's change the thoughts you have about the list. And one of the best ways we can do that is to just make a choice and start moving forward, make a decision. And action creates that clarity that we need.
Recap and Takeaways 34:14
So those are the three excuses that I wanted to talk about today, three beliefs that you may have said at some point in your life, I can't afford it, I don't have time, and I'm overwhelmed. And my goal with this episode was to make you think, to think about what you believe and think about how your beliefs impact the results you're getting. I want you to live life intentionally. And sometimes that means confronting you with a concept that you know kind of shifts your paradigm. And I've realized that as a coach, I can help you change your life. If I can help you change the way you think. And I can change the beliefs that you have about yourself and about what's possible. And as we hold to these beliefs that aren't helping us that aren't serving us that are keeping us stuck, as soon as we can come to recognize them first as beliefs, and then start to shift to change those beliefs, so stuff that's going to actually help us to create the results that we want. That's when the magic comes. And we'll talk more about limiting beliefs in an upcoming episode. If that's something that interests you, I'd love to hear that you're interested in it. But know that when it comes to limiting beliefs, the first step, which is over 50% of the work, is simply identifying them. Because again, they don't show up as beliefs. They don't say, Hey, I have this belief that I can't afford it, we look at it and say, No, I can't afford it. Like, I have to do this. And I have to do this. And I have to pay for this. And I have to pay for this. And so we don't see it as a belief, we just see it as like, that's the way the world is. But when you can start to see everything as a belief, and something that is changeable. And something that you can change the way that you perceive things. It opens up a world of possibilities for you for the results that you are able to create in your life. And as a coach, that's what I want for you. I want for you to have everything in your life that you want to have for you to be able to create everything in your world that you want. And that starts with understanding your beliefs and understanding what you're choosing to believe. And then understanding that it's a choice and that you can always change what you believe, to be able to support the goals and aspirations and desires that you have for the future.
Continue to support and share BAB’s podcast 36:27
Now as I wrap up this episode, if this was something that made you think, or it made you consider things in a different light, I would love it if you would share this with somebody who you think would be helpful. That wraps up this episode of biceps after babies radio now go out and be strong because remember my friend, you can do anything.
Outro
Hold up, sister friend. Do you love Biceps after Babies radio? If so, the best way to say thank you is to subscribe to the podcast and leave a review on iTunes. I know, every podcaster wants you to leave a review, but it's because those reviews help the podcast to reach more people. And I do truly want to know what you think. If this particular episode resonated with you, will you also please share it? Either send the link to someone who would find it valuable or take a screenshot and post it to your social media and tell your friends and family why they should listen. Make sure you tag me @biceps.after.babies so I can hear your feedback and give you a little love. And you know, if you aren't already following me on Instagram or Facebook, that's the perfect time to hit that follow button. Thank you for being here and listening to Biceps after Babies radio.
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