230: Should I Cut, Reverse, or Maintain? | Live Coaching Session Replay

Introduction 

You're listening to Biceps After Babies Radio episode number 230.

Hello and welcome to Biceps After Babies Radio. A podcast for ladies who know that fitness is about so much more than pounds lost or PRs. It's about feeling confident in your skin and empowered in your life. I'm your host, Amber Brueseke, a registered nurse, personal trainer, wife, and mom of four. Each week, my guests and I will excite and motivate you to take action in your own personal fitness as we talk about nutrition, exercise mindset, personal development, and executing life with conscious intention. If your goal is to look, feel, and be strong and experience transformation from the inside out, you, my friend are in the right place. Thank you for tuning in, now let’s jump into today’s episode.

 

Amber B  0:47  

Hey, hey, hey,  welcome back to another episode of Biceps After Babies Radio. I'm your host, Amber Brueseke. And today we are bringing you a live coaching replay. This is from one of our MACROS 101 sessions. And the reason that I'm putting this on the podcast is that in this episode, in this coaching session, I walk Jennifer through, I coach her through making the decision between cutting, reversing, and maintaining, which is a really, really common question that people have as they embark on their journey. Oftentimes, we think, oh, I want to lose weight, that means I should go into a cut. And honestly, that isn't the case for everybody. And so a lot of women make the mistake of diving into a cut because they want to lose weight. And sometimes that is the worst possible phase for you to start in. 

 

Amber B  1:38  

So if you are unfamiliar with the different phases, cutting, reversing and maintaining, I really highly suggest going and listening to Episode 76. It's called The Cycles of Weight Loss. And I talk about those different phases in that episode. So if you are somebody who has questions about how to decide which phase to be in, maybe you're a little bit resistant, maybe part of you thinks or knows that you should start a reverse diet. Speaking of which, if you don't know what a reverse diet is, highly, highly recommend Episode 9, Episode 10, Episode 42, 114, and 170. We'll link those all up in the show notes. But those are the episodes where I talk about reverse dieting, I explain what it is, I explained why somebody would do it, and I explained how to do it in those episodes. 

 

Amber B  2:27 

So but this is a question a lot of people have is like, should I start reverse? Or should I start to cut? Do I need to spend time at maintenance? Do I need to bulk? And that's a question that a lot of people have. And so I coached Jennifer through answering that question for her in this coaching session. And I really think it's going to be valuable if you have a similar question. 

 

Amber B  2:45 

If you would like to get coached like this live, that is what I do inside of MACROS 101, in MACROS 101, I give you the tools, and I teach you how to use macro counting in your own unique individual journey, how to be able to take that tool and customize it to you so that you can build a customized plan to be able to fit your body, your lifestyle. I trained clients and how to become macro scientists so that instead of following some cookie-cutter plan or somebody else setting your macros and you're not understanding anything about the process that you are well aware and are able to become the scientist and make logical, rational decisions in your journey rather than the very emotional ones that oftentimes happen. Inside of MACROS 101, in addition to teaching you all those things, I also coach you through the process, as you'll hear me coach Jennifer as well. And so if that's something that you're wanting or interested in for your journey, I highly recommend getting on the interest list. This is the First In Line list. We let these people know first when we open up doors to MACROS 101, which will be August 29. We open it twice a year. Next one is August 29. So you can get on the interest list at bicepsafterbabies.com/waitlist. 

 

Amber B  3:56  

If you are tired of your only tool for transformation being restriction and deprivation and cutting out food groups, and you want to be someone who can look in the mirror and actually see a visible transformation. And like me, and you aren't willing to cut out sugar to get there, then macro counting is the tool that is missing from your tool belt. But just like any tool, any hammer, a saw, the tool is really only as effective as the person who is wielding the tool actually makes it. And when I see time and time again, are women who start using the tool of macro counting without really understanding how to do it. They don't understand how to set or adjust their macros. And this leads them to getting lackluster results, getting frustrated with the process and scrolling through Instagram just feeling defeated because they're like well, macro counting worked for that woman, why the heck didn't work for me. And then getting to this place where they just quit and you say something silly like Well, I tried macro counting and it didn't work. That's like letting go of a helium balloon and watching it float away and saying, Well, I guess gravity just didn't work. No friend, science is science. Gravity is working just like it should on that balloon, you just don't quite understand the nuances of gravity, right? And it's the same thing with macro counting. The question is not does macro counting work? Because macro counting is just basic science. The question is, how can I wield that scientific principle? How can I wield that tool of macro counting to get better results? How can I use that tool for my specific situation. And that's what I teach my clients inside of Confidence In Your Numbers. 

 

Amber B  5:37 

I created Confidence In Your Numbers, because I saw a big glaring hole in the market. And that is too many women are relying on expensive coaches to set and adjust their macros for them. Now, again, I get it. Most coaches want you to pay them and in exchange, they'll set their your macros for you. And then if you want to pay them more money, they'll “coach” you and they'll adjust your macros for you week to week. But of course, they're not going to actually teach you how to do it yourself. Because why? Well, it's simple. It benefits them to make adjusting your macros and setting them feel as complicated and as nebulous as possible. But it's really not that complicated. And well, that's not my business model. I don't want to set your macros for you. And I really don't want you to keep paying me to have me adjust them for you, I would rather teach you how to do it yourself. So that you don't have to keep paying someone month to month to do something that really is simple enough for you to do on your own. It's kind of like that comment saying, If you give a woman a fish, eats for a day, and if you give a woman teach a woman how to fish, eats for a lifetime. So the question really is, do you want to be the woman who gets given a fish and then you're left metaphorically to starve when you stop paying for the fish? Or do you want to be the woman who learns how to fish so you can keep snagging those fish for free without having to rely on someone else to feed you? If you're like me, and you're the type of woman who wants to learn how to fish then Confidence In Your Numbers is for you. 

 

Amber B  7:01  

Confidence In Your Numbers is a live masterclass where I teach you how to set your macros for your unique body. And I teach you how to adjust them over time. Because here's the second common mistake that I see a lot of women making when they start counting macros. They set their macros and they're like, oh, success is just as easy as following these numbers to the finish line. Which is kind of like saying you can travel the world in a single-vehicle, right? Okay, stay with me on this metaphor. So sure, a car is great for driving across the US. But then, when you hit the Atlantic Ocean, you can't drive that car any further, you have to get into a new vehicle like a boat or a plane to keep going. And the same thing applies to your macros. If you just set your macros once and keep following them, you're going to plateau, you're going to hit the Atlantic Ocean and you're going to get frustrated because what you're doing isn't working anymore. And then you're gonna quit and then you're really not gonna see results. So just like you have to swap out your vehicle based on the terrain. If you want to avoid plateauing in your journey, you're going to need to adjust your macros throughout the process, and which for some people could feel like it's really complex, and that's what most coaches want you to believe so that you'll pay them to do it. But I'm not like type of coach, which is why inside of Confidence In Your Numbers I've simplified, adjusting macros into something that anyone can learn and allows you to skip the overpriced coach, accelerate your results and keep your hard-earned money in your pocket. 

 

Amber B  8:23  

So if you want to learn to set and adjust your own macros, come join me for my Live, Paid Masterclass on July 28, you can go to my website right now and you can purchase a prior recording of Confidence In Your Numbers. It's always on sale for $199 but because I will be delivering this class live which is always more fun anyway. If you joined before July 28, you'll get all the secrets about setting and adjusting your macros for just $99 and because Confidence In Your Numbers is the perfect step to take before signing up for MACROS 101. We also allow you to apply what you pay towards Confidence In Your Numbers into MACROS 101, which means if you're listening to this and you plan to join us for the next round of MACROS 101 at the end of August. Joining Confidence In Your Numbers is essentially free because the investment you make in Confidence In Your Numbers will be applied towards your MACROS 101 enrollment, which is super cool. So if you're ready to finally snap that after picture that you've always wanted, come and join my live masterclass Confidence In Your Numbers and you're going to walk away with all those secrets that most coaches won't share about how to set and adjust your own macros. To sign up, go to bicepsafterbabies.com/confidence to get registered for class. And I'll see you on July 28. That's bicepsafterbabies.com/confidence. 

 

Amber B  9:44  

Now let's jump into the coaching conversation with Jennifer.

 

Jennifer  9:49  

Thank you. I'm glad to be here. Yeah, wow. 

 

Amber B  9:52  

Okay, I'm gonna give you, just this is for you and for everybody who's listening, the way that you're gonna get the most out of this experience is by starting with your question. Okay. Sometimes people want to give me a lot of backstory to their question. And that's I get it, but ask me the question and then if I need backstory, I will ask you for the backstory, okay, that's gonna be, we're gonna get to the answer a lot quicker when we do that, then we'll have like this 30-minute story about you tell me about your whole entire life. Cool?

 

Jennifer  10:22  

Cool. 

 

Amber B  10:23  

What's your question? 

 

Jennifer  10:24  

All right, at its most basic, the question is: Reverse, cut, or maintenance? 

 

Amber B  10:29  

Great. 

 

Jennifer  10:30  

At the same question. I'm sure a lot of people have, you know, I've listened to a lot of the podcasts and everything. And I can't figure it out.

 

Amber B  10:39  

Okay. Well, you can, you will, you will figure it out. Right?

 

Jennifer  10:45  

Right. So far, I have not been able to figure it out.

 

Amber B  10:48  

I have not yet figured it out. And that's what we're going to do together. You're gonna leave this conversation with us, and you're gonna have a next step. Okay. 

 

Jennifer  10:56  

That'd be great. 

 

Amber B  10:57  

Awesome. Okay. So tell me what feels hardest about making this decision?

 

Jennifer  11:02  

I'm being honest. Because I feel like probably what, maybe I need to do, I don't want to do. And so you know, I was actually just I, before, all this, I pulled out the sheet, the flowchart, and what's your goal and all that. And, number one, I am having a hard time choosing between goals, because I have multiple goals. And then I'm answering the questions. And I'm like, Well, maybe well, kinda, and so sort of, like really being honest about it. And I'm just, there's my struggle, I want to gain muscle and I want to lose fat. I want to do both. And I want to do them both immediately. And I want to do them both right now. Yeah, I'm being honest. Right. So –

 

Amber B  11:56  

Well, I always, always want you guys to be honest. Awesome. So do you understand why trying to do those simultaneously is going to leave you not having an either?

 

Jennifer  12:07  

Yeah, just the science behind it doesn't work out. So well, if you're trying to-

 

Amber B  12:12  

explain the science?

 

Jennifer  12:14  

Well, I'll get it the best I can but you know, I mean, cutting is calorie deficit and gaining muscle is not conducive. Cutting your calories is not necessarily conducive to muscle gain. And so two things that don't necessarily work out.

 

Amber B  12:40  

They're essentially opposing environments, opposite environments. Okay. So I totally get that you want both right now, at the same time, like you and every other woman in the whole world. So it's okay, we can want both at the same time. But you know, that, if you try to do both simultaneously, what's going to happen is you're not going to have either, okay, so if we stay here and like, try to do both, you're not going to get either and now you are going to be in the same position that you are in six months from now. And I don't want that and I'm pretty sure that you don't want that. Okay. 

 

Jennifer  13:20  

Yeah, no, that's, I mean, that's why I'm here because that's what I have been doing and I'm just spinning my wheels and spinning my wheels and not you know, I have this like, why am I not getting anywhere? And I think this is it. 

 

Amber B  13:33  

Yeah, good. Awesome. And it's awesome that you're starting to realize that, right? Yeah, that's really valuable. Will you tell me about the last six months in terms of what you've done with lifting, what you've done with your calories? Just kind of give me a recap of the last six months.

 

Jennifer  13:51  

So I'm a Weight Watcher girl, I've done that for a long time. I'll give you the whole history but I lost like 180 pounds. I had gastric bypass surgery like nine years ago, pulled off a ton of weight it goes back off a little. So Weight Watchers you know, it does a lot of the same mindset kind of stuff and tracking just in a different kind of way and all that and I guess you know, COVID made everything go crazy, right? I let COVID make everything go crazy. Pretty crazy. And so I had gained some weight back and kind of jumped back into Weight Watchers to try to pull it back off again. And somewhere in there, the lifting fell apart because the class I used to go to again COVID ruined everything right. And so, but I just found I was just hitting this sort of wall where I was hitting like I hit a plateau that I just I had never really experienced that like a long plateau before where I'd like to gain two pounds and then lose two pounds and gain three pounds and lose three pounds. I mean, it was just like, I thought I couldn't make any headway. And that's been going on for a while. And that's actually sort of what brought me to trying to expand, like, what is going on here. Things that used to work are not working for me right now, what is going on? And that sort of brought me to macros and brought me to Biceps After Babies, and all of that. 

 

Amber B  15:35  

Awesome. 

 

Jennifer  15:36  

Does that answer the question?

 

Amber B  15:38  

Yeah, absolutely. So give me a little bit of timeframe like how long have you been back to Weight Watchers and like trying to lose weight and how long has that been for you? 

 

Jennifer  15:51  

I guess it was like, maybe October that I stepped on the scale and was like, Oh, dear, okay. COVID has been worse than I realized. But didn't really sort of buckle down back into it more until like, December, maybe something right around there.

 

Amber B  16:10  

So from December to about June, you've been in a fat loss phase. Correct? 

 

Jennifer  16:16  

Yes. 

 

Amber B  16:17  

Okay. So what is coming up for you when you go through that flowchart? And we come to the question of like, how long have you been dieting and your answer is longer than six months, what prevents you from going on to like that box?

 

Jennifer  16:37  

Because I haven't been doing it perfectly for six months. I've been doing it but then you got like a week where you got to go off the rails or whatever. And so have I been like, right on track for six months? No. And so then that gives me the kind of out in my head to say, Well, I'm really been doing it for six months.

 

Amber B  16:57  

Yeah. Yeah. Cuz you haven't been doing it perfectly. And the only way to be successful is to do it perfectly.

 

Jennifer  17:03  

Yes. Correct.

 

Amber B  17:04  

Yeah. No. Right? 

 

Jennifer  17:07  

I mean, I know it, right. 

 

Amber B  17:10  

Yeah. You're saying what we all say in our brains, right? So I appreciate that you like are willing to verbalize what everybody thinks in their brain because everybody has had that thought before. It's like, well, if I was just a little bit more strict, well, if I just stayed on the weekends, well, if I really buckled down, but here's the question I want you to think about. If you haven't done that in the last six months, what is going to make the next six months different? You're going to try harder. That's what people hear. I'm going to try harder. Like, I'm just gonna do it. I'm just gonna buckle down. I'm just gonna do it. Right. And, you know, I would love for you to just but you know, no, actually, I don't really want you to buckle down. But that's what we tell ourselves. That's what we like think. But in reality, what typically happens?

 

Jennifer  18:00  

Life right, so you try it for a while, and you can be consistent for a while, but without systems in place and all the rest of it and the other thing that happens is I fight this like, I've realized this over the last few months, or whatever, actually, over the last couple of years that I have this like defiant part of my personality and she comes out sometimes and says I don't want to, I know what I need to do. I just don't want to do it. Now I'll say I'm so I'm not going to do it today. But tomorrow, I will do it again. And then the next day, she comes back again and then taps me on the shoulder and says You still don't want to do it so don't do it. 

 

Amber B  18:44  

Yep. Good. 

 

Jennifer  18:45  

She's gonna get in the way if I keep ignoring her.

 

Amber B  18:50  

Say that again. 

 

Jennifer  18:52  

The defiant lady that lives inside of me is going to get in my way if I keep ignoring her.

 

Amber B  18:57  

So ignoring her is not working. 

 

Jennifer  19:00  

No. 

 

Amber B  19:01  

So what is going to work? 

 

Jennifer  19:03  

I don't know. 

 

Amber B  19:04  

Good. That's why I'm here.

 

Jennifer  19:06  

Yeah, good. Because that's I mean, so that's, I mean, Amber. That's the gist of it is that, like again, I've been listening to the podcasts like, I know that the reverse is probably what I need to do. It is so scary. It is terrifying. Again, as a person who remembers being 319 pounds, I don't want any part of that ever, ever again. This is so much better. And I'm afraid that if I let go of the reins a little bit, it's gonna get away from me or something. 

 

Amber B  19:42 

Yeah, and  I get that and I'm gonna walk you through that. We're gonna work through that. Because that fear of going back to where you were, is what is preventing you from getting to a better place. So you're essentially what you're doing is you're settling, you're settling right now for like an okay place but what is available to you is a much better place. And when we can get past that fear and move forward, which I'm here, that's what I'm here to do, like, I'm here to help you, we're going to work through that, and we're gonna get you to that place. But what is possible for you, I don't want you settling. I don't think that you are the type of person who wants to settle. And so we can't like we're going to work through because right now is fear is holding you back from what's possible for you. 

 

Amber B  20:31 

So, okay, where do you want to go first? I want to get to the reverse. Because here's the truth and this is for everybody. When I'm talking to Jennifer, I am talking to all of you guys. Yes, I'm talking to Jennifer and I'm talking to you guys. If you're coming into this process, with a part of your brain saying that you may need to do a reverse, you probably need to do a reverse. Okay? If there is a part of you saying, probably need to do this, I want you to listen to that portion. Okay? And yes, it's scary, yes, we're going to work through some of that, and we're going to help you kind of walk through that and kind of reframe that a little bit for you. But if that is coming up for you, I want you to honor that. And Jennifer, what's going to be really powerful for you, again, a lot of the things that we're going to talk about, and a lot of the coaching I'm going to do is on, I know what Jennifer talks about, like those two, like, who can relate to like the two sides of you? The one side that's like, I'm gonna be so good and I'm gonna do it well, on the other side, like not today, sister, I don't want to do that like rebelling against it. And now you feel like you're fighting against yourself. And what Jennifer said is, like, is so powerful, that she's been trying to ignore that side of her and it hasn't worked. And that's what typically we try to do is we try to willpower our way through, like just pushing that side of us away and it doesn't work. It produces where a lot of you guys are on, right? Like everyone's saying, Yeah, that's me. Okay, so what we can understand is that you fighting against that you trying to like have more motivation have more willpower isn't what's going to fix that, it isn't what's going to help you to make progress, what is going to help you to make progress is learning to work with that. And learning to get to the place, here's the here's a powerful place for all of you guys to get to and I talked about this in one of the modules, is when you get to the place where it is not that I can't have that, it's that I really don't want that. That's the difference. That's the difference between someone who is white-knuckling it and restricting and trying to like willpower everything to the person who has now just created a lifestyle of like, that's actually what they want. 

 

Amber B  22:52 

I give the example of my dad, my dad is so funny in so many ways. But my dad doesn't really like chocolate, like, he just doesn't he just like couldn't care less about chocolate. And so he could go into a party and there's like a big huge chocolate cake. And he literally like does not want it. So if he's not feeling restricted, he's not telling himself no, he can have it if you want. He's like I don't, I really don't want it, which is different from somebody who goes to that same party. And it's like, I can't have the cake. I can't have the cake. I really, really want the cake and you're like trying to fight against yourself. So the question is, how do we move from this like fight to having them align, having those two parts of your brain align? And in module three, okay, so module three, I really walk you through how we start to align the subconscious with the conscious mind and that reprogramming, that's going to happen, okay, so I'm not going to teach all of that right now, because you guys have all have that content. And so you're gonna go through it, and you're gonna go through it a couple of times, because you're going to pick up new things as you go through that process. So I wanted to highlight that for anybody who's feeling some of the same things is that's really normal. You're coming in this process and that's been your problem, like, yeah, that's why we have like an entire module on self-sabotage, because that is something that a lot of you guys struggle with, and there's a way to work through it. Okay. So that's going to your homework, right, it's like going to Module Three, and starting to go through that content. So then I want to come over here to the reverse and this idea, because a lot of you are sitting in the same place where you like know that you probably should reverse and yet it's really, really scary. And for Jennifer, what I heard you say was that you don't want to go back to being 300 plus pounds. And so in your brain you've equated if I increase my calories, then what?

 

Jennifer  24:44 

I'm gonna gain weight again.

 

Amber B  24:46  

I'm gonna gain weight, okay. Do you understand the concept of metabolic adaptation or what do you understand about it? Tell it to me.

 

Jennifer  25:00  

That if you stay at a certain sort of caloric level for a long period of time your body gets used to that. 

 

Amber B  25:09  

Good. 

 

Jennifer  25:09  

I mean, at the most basic.

 

Amber B  25:11  

Yep, that's exactly right. And so what is going to happen if you stay at this caloric level and or keep dropping? What's gonna happen? Where are you going to be six months from now, a year from now?

 

Jennifer  25:23  

Exactly where I am now, probably, or, worse. Wrong?

 

Amber B  25:28  

Yeah, you'll be worse off because it's not going to stop. If you drop your calories, like, it's the metabolic adaptation is going to continue to happen, it's not going to magically fix itself. So sometimes we tell ourselves that it's really scary to go forward into reverse, because if we like, just stay where we're at, then like six months from now, at the very least, we'll just be where we're at right now. But in actuality, you will be worse off six months from now. So and if a year from now, you will be even worse off, okay, so you don't just stay where you're at, you're actually moving in the wrong direction. Right now, you are on a train that is going where you don't want it to go. So we can't just like sit on the train and hope that like it's magically going to end up where you want it to be. We got to get off the train and get on a new train.

 

Jennifer  26:22  

Okay, so the things that I've worked kind of read about reversing and adding in calories gradually until you find your sweet spot and all the rest of that, if that's part of the thing that I'm getting hung up on is it'd be like, Okay, we're going to add 100 calorie for a week or whatever. Okay, that's all great if I am eating very consistent number of calories every day. But I'm not necessarily. I have days where I'm eating 1000 calories, and I have days when I'm eating 2000 calories, actually, probably not 2000 calories so much anymore. So I don't, like in my head, I don't understand how that is gonna work when I don't. That'd be great if I'm like 1450 calories, or 1400 to 1460 calories every day.

 

Amber B  27:20  

Why do you think that you're not consistent with your calories?

 

Jennifer  27:31  

Why do I think that I'm not or why am I not?

 

Amber B  27:35  

Yeah, well, what prevents you from being consistent with them? 

 

Jennifer  27:41  

Oh, I guess just having you know, when you have days that when I listen to the, I don't want to Lady and so I have a day where I'm way off, I am actually pretty consistent. And I've been pretty consistent. I just don't feel like I can. That I'm within 100 calories a day consistent to the point where it's going to really make a big difference to go up in calories.

 

Amber B  28:13  

Do you have an average amount of calories that you eat?

 

Jennifer  28:17  

Probably. And I pull that out right to second? I mean, I would have to go back? I mean, I do like I've been tracking. You know, Weight Watchers, I track forever. And my fitness pal probably for the last, I don't know, months, six weeks.

 

Amber B  28:30  

But you have an average amount of calories that you eat?

 

Jennifer  28:33  

Okay, true. 

 

Amber B  28:34  

So what if those average amount of calories went up over time?

 

Jennifer  28:40  

Yeah, I guess there's math required with this.

 

Amber B  28:44  

A little bit, not any more math than like, my sports can do so.

 

Jennifer  28:49  

Okay, good. Because I can handle that.

 

Amber B  28:52  

But the truth is, and you know, this is what comes up is like, we don't really want to do something, we're scared to do something. So then our brain comes up with all of these reasons why we it will work and what we can't do it and then we just stay stuck and or like it works, okay. And so the truth is, is that you're eating an average amount of calories, whether you eat 1000 a day and 2000 another day, like that's an average over two days at 1500 calories. And so we can focus on getting that average up over time. Now, here's the piece that I want you to consider Jennifer. Have you ever considered that the reason that you have not been consistent with your calories is because you are swinging back and forth between restriction and like overeating? 

 

Jennifer  29:30  

Oh, for sure. 

 

Amber B  29:31  

Yeah, cool. So it's like a tennis match, where it's like, I restrict and then that I hit the ball and it goes back over to overeating because I was restricting too much. And then it goes back over to now I have to restrict and it's like this. It's like, everybody keeps hitting the ball harder and harder on every side thinking that like if I just hit the ball, then I'm not gonna get back to the swing and what happens is that it just gets hit back to you harder and then you hit harder. We have these big pendulum swings back and forth. And people think that the solution to the pendulum swing is to just try harder, just grit your teeth a little bit more. But that never works, because now you've just added more potential energy to the other side and we swing back and forth. So the solution is not to try harder, the solution is not to grit your teeth,  the solution is not to white knuckle it, it is to get into the middle.

 

Jennifer  30:28  

And that will be great.

 

Amber B  30:29  

Yeah, in the middle and that's what we're going to find. And so right now you're in this like catch 22, where you're like, in order to reverse, I have to like have consistent calories. But the reason you don't have a consistent calorie is because you are not reversing. It's because you're swinging back and forth. And so what we find a lot is that as we start reversing, what women will find is that the pendulum starts to swing less and less and less and less, and you're likely going to get more consistent with your calories because you're not swinging back and forth between that binge and restrict cycle. Okay, so having consistent calories is not a prerequisite for starting to reverse.

 

Jennifer  31:09  

Okay. In my mind, it was.

 

Amber B  31:12  

I know, because our minds are really good with coming up with reasons to do not do things that we don't want to do. If anybody who's in the same situation as Jennifer and is like, I want to sort of reverse but I have no idea where to start with my calories, because I'm kind of all over the board, take an average number of whatever you ate last week. Okay, you probably you've been tracking for a long time, you have an average amount of calories. And from there, you add 100 calories. Okay, so that may mean you may be starting, I don't know, 1500 calories, 1600 calories, which may feel scary to you, if some days you've been eating 1000. And your brain is gonna say, oh my gosh, hold on, like, this is scary, you're gonna like you're gonna lose all your progress, but recognize that you're still eating the average amount of calories, even though some days are gonna be a little higher than normal, some days are going to be a little lower, but that average amount of calories has only gone up by 100. Okay, have you gone to the reverse dieting modules? I know, I'm like, I'm directing.

 

Jennifer  32:10  

And I've listened to some of the podcast stuff, but I haven't gotten modules yet now.

 

Amber B  32:14  

So you and anybody else who is here for reverse side or thinking about it, I recommend skipping ahead to those reverse modules and going through them starting to familiarize yourself with the process, educating yourself on the process is going to make it feel a little bit less scary. I give an analogy in that. But I'm actually going to use a different analogy right now. So that you have a couple of analogies in your back pocket that you can pull out. But right now, you just told me that you've been dieting for six months. Well, first six months in the recent past and you're not going anywhere. It's like you're driving a car and you're stuck in a snowbank and you're pushing on the gas and you're pushing on the gas and you're pushing on the gas, and you're spinning, like you're in a snowbank and your wheels are just spinning, you're not actually making any progress. And we think that the solution is to just press harder. I just press harder on the gas pedal, I would get out of the snowbank. But what happens when you press harder in a snowbank, Jennifer?

 

Jennifer  33:18  

More spinning, it will just spin.

 

Amber B  33:22  

You don't go anywhere. And that's where you're currently at. In fact, you actually make it worse because you dig yourself deeper. What are you gonna say?

 

Jennifer  33:31  

Well, yes and no, the reason that I kind of found you and found macros, and all that was because I was spinning, spinning, spinning. But when I kind of shifted a little bit, again, away from sort of the Weight Watcher tracking method, like I am actually making some progress. So like, I probably have lost five, six pounds, you know, over the last eight weeks or so. So that's the other thing that then messes with your head is you go, Okay, other places on this flowchart, say, well, like if you're making progress, like, keep on, keep on, keeping on right, so then there's the other part of me that's like, wow, I mean, I'm not totally stalled out. I'm not totally stuck in the snowbank.

 

Amber B  34:15  

So what just happened is your car lurched forward, and you're like, I'm gonna get out. But what's going to happen is the car's gonna work back. And you're gonna be done. Macros are not magic, guys. It's not magic. Yeah, it like sometimes feels nice to like, Oh, I'm gonna do this new thing. And this new thing is gonna work so much better than the old thing. It's not like a lure of like, the next best thing. It's not magic. And so yeah, you like have a little bit of push forward and it felt like oh, I might be making some progress. But having had like hearing your dieting history, hearing where you've been at, it's going to be short-lived. 

 

Jennifer  34:53  

Okay. 

 

Amber B  34:54  

So what is the solution to getting out of the snowbank? It's not as sit there and keep hitting the gas. It is to get out of your car. It's to go grab some sandbags, it's to go toss the sandbags in the back of your car, get back in your car and pull out. Does that take a little bit more time?

 

Jennifer  35:18  

I was just gonna say that seems like a lot of work Amber.

 

Amber B  35:20  

And seems like a lot of work seems like a lot of time. Amber, I don't have that much time. But in the long run, who gets out of the snowbank faster, the person who sits there and pushes the gas over and over and over again, or the person who takes the time to go out and get the sandbags? Who's going to win the race?

 

Jennifer  35:39  

Sandbag lady.

 

Amber B  35:40  

Sandbag lady, okay. And so that's what you have right now you have an option is that you can sit here and you can keep going the way that you've been going. Or you can choose to play this smart and go get your sandbags and do something different and not keep spinning your wheels in your journey. And that's up to you. What do you want to do? You know, like, again, it comes down. This is not my journey. But the question is, is it worth it to you to take the time, go through reverse have it be scary, and do it because at the end of the day, you know that it's what's going to take to be able to get the results that you want?

 

Jennifer  36:19  

Well, and I think the other thing that is tempting about the reverse, is I do still want to gain muscle and do some of those other, you know, I do want to swing to that part too. And so like if I'm-

 

Amber B  36:35  

So now we're coming full circle to your very first question that you asked, like, I want to lose fat and gain muscle. Awesome. And we talked about how you can't do those both simultaneously simultaneously. And if right now is not the right time to be focusing on fat loss because of your dieting history, it's an excellent time to be focusing on the gaining muscle. And that is part of what you want it anyway. Right. So that's an amazing part. And so when you're in a reverse and in a maintenance period, that is going to be ideal time to be putting on that muscle. Now please do not listen to that anybody who is listening to this, do not hear that I just said you should not be lifting in a cut. You should be, okay. So sometimes people hear me that and they like take this leap of logic and think oh, well, Amber said that I should start lifting weights when I'm in a reverse or maintenance. So since I'm not there yet, I won't start lifting weights. No, no, I'm just saying you're going to optimize for muscle building much better when you have higher calories and when you have lower calories. So that's your opportunity right now. And Jennifer, that's what's going to be one of your saving graces is because a lot of times women struggle because during a reverse and during maintenance so like I'm not making progress but it's because they're not looking at where they shouldn't be making progress, right. And so when we can start to set those physical goals, we can start to say, hey, I want to hit a bodyweight deadlift, hey, I want to like see my bicep flex go up. I like these other physical goals that have not to do with losing fat that has to do with gaining muscle, you're going to start to see that progress and it's half of the equation of what you want it anyway.

 

Jennifer  38:02  

It really is too. Because the truth is like I'm in a weight where like, I'm more than I want to be, but it's not horrible. You know, it's not horrible. But I definitely do want the muscle and the strength that comes up here because boy, what I've learned over the last couple years is the stronger I am here, the stronger I am here too. So that'll help with the other as well, I'm guessing. Okay. 

 

Amber B  38:28  

Awesome. 

 

Jennifer  38:28  

Thank you.

 

Amber B  38:30  

What is the takeaway? What are you taking away from this conversation?

 

Jennifer  38:35  

That my instincts were actually pretty good that I did need the reverse, regardless of how scary it is, but that it's, you know, what I need to do to not spin my wheels and that I need to go look at so Module Three about self-sabotage and skip ahead to the reverse module. Yeah, just do it.

 

Amber B  38:58  

I would start with Module Five, go through Module Five first, and then Module Three will be really good for you as well. 

 

Jennifer  39:04  

Awesome. I'll do it. 

 

Amber B  39:05  

Okay. Thanks for being brave, and being the first person to come on.

 

Jennifer  39:09  

No problem. I am nothing if not transparent. So-

 

Amber B  39:13  

I love it. Yeah. And you know, all of you guys who are listening, I saw it and like the comments of people saying how helpful it is. You can see the value of having somebody get on here and be honest and share with their brain is thinking that's where we can really create a coaching environment that's going to be able to not only help Jennifer, but help a lot of you guys who are listening. So thank you so much. 

 

Amber B  39:33

That wraps up the coaching call with Jennifer, I hope that was valuable to you and you learn some things about reversing and about how to make that leap, and more importantly about how to address those concerns that you have that we all have on repeat in our head and how to move past some of those fears that maybe you have if you're like Jennifer. 

 

Amber B  39:56

Again, if you would like to be able to have access to coaching like this, that's what I do inside of MACROS 101, and we will be opening doors on August 29. So go ahead and go to bicepsafterbabies.com/waitlist. By doing that you'll get to be first in line when we open doors and you'll also get access to a 14-day macro bootcamp in order to help you have to start taking action right away so that you don't have to wait around for MACROS 101 to open. That wraps up this episode of Biceps After Babies Radio. I'm Amber, now go on and be strong because remember my friend, you can do anything. 

 

Outro

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