184: The Illusion of Control with Katie Boyack [“I Did It” Series]

Introduction 

You're listening to Biceps after Babies radio episode number 184.

Hello and welcome to Biceps after Babies radio. A podcast for ladies who know that fitness is about so much more than pounds lost or PRs. It's about feeling confident in your skin and empowered in your life. I'm your host, Amber Brueseke, a registered nurse, personal trainer, wife, and mom of four.  Each week, my guests and I will excite and motivate you to take action in your own personal fitness as we talk about nutrition, exercise mindset, personal development, and executing life with conscious intention. If your goal is to look, feel, and be strong and experience transformation from the inside out, you, my friend are in the right place. Thank you for tuning in, now let’s jump into today’s episode.

 

Amber B  0:47  

Hey, Hey, Hey, welcome back to another episode of Biceps after Babies Radio. I'm your host, Amber Brueseke. And this is one of our Friday “I Did It”  series where we share stories from women, who are just like you, who were able to do it in hopes that the more that you see it's possible from other women, the more you'll be able to believe it's possible for you. And I think the other thing that I love about these stories is that there's always lessons and things that you can pull out that you can apply to your life to make it just a little bit better. And that's one of the reasons I love this series so much and that you guys love this series so much. So today on the podcast, I interviewed Katie Boyack. And Katie shares a story very similar to many people how the pandemic really kind of had her life come crashing down in a way that she didn't expect, and really kind of made her feel out of control. Like she was lacking control during that time. And she joined Macros 101 in September of 2020. And really had some lessons that she needed to learn about this idea of control and what that looks like in her life and how she could kind of step outside of some of that comfort zone that things that were comfortable for her in order to reach new heights and new levels of personal development. And it's just amazing to see where Katie was two years ago when the pandemic hit to where she is today and the growth that's been able to occur. And I think for any of you who struggle with depression, or any of that, mental space having– just a challenging time during the pandemic. Maybe it's still even continued. Was precipitated by the pandemic, but doesn't mean it's over by any stretch of the imagination. I think that you're going to get a lot from Katie's story as she shares it with you today. 

 

Amber B  2:47 

If you are not on the waitlist yet for Macros 101, and you are interested and curious about joining and being able to get coached, and being able to learn about macros, and how to become a macro scientist, and how to apply this tool to your unique specific journey. We opened doors to Macros 101 in March of 2022. We only open doors twice a year. So it's kind of a big deal. It's not like you can join all the time. So if that's something you're interested in doing, I highly recommend getting on the waitlist at bicepsafterbabies.com/waitlist. And without further ado, let's jump into the interview with Katie Boyack.

 

Amber B  2:57  

All right, I am so excited to welcome Katie to the podcast. Hey Katie, how are you doing?

 

Katie  3:31  

Hi, Amber. I'm good. It’s early.

 

Amber B  3:34  

It is early. And we are ready to chat about your journey. And I'm excited to be able to share a little bit of what you've learned because I know you've learned quite a bit and sharing that with everybody who's listening to the podcast. So will you start out just kind of introducing yourself and maybe sharing a little bit about what made you sign up for Macros 101? Like what were you struggling with before you hit that purchase button?

 

Katie  4:00  

So, I'm Katie Boyack. I am currently 37 years old. I am married to my husband Jake, almost 14 years. We have two kids, a boy and a girl. And we live in Sequim, Washington. Which is on the outskirts of the world.

 

Amber B  4:21  

Yes, but I know where it is cuz I grew up in Washington and I'm like I know where it is

 

Katie   4:25  

Yes. And you've been to Sequim. I have– 

 

Amber B  4:28  

Yep. I went camping in Sequim when I was growing up.

 

Katie  4:32  

In someone's backyard. 

 

Amber B  4:33  

In someone's backyard. That's a whole ‘nother story. Okay, I have tell the story really quick now because– everyone's gonna be like, “Wait, what's the story?” So, I remember when I was probably– I don't know. I was young. Maybe I was eight or something like that. My mom and her friend decided that they were going to take their kid's camping. And of course, the husbands were working late and so my mom and her friend were like, “Yeah, we could do it.” And between the two of them, I'm pretty sure they had, not joking, had 10 Kids. I think we had five and they had five. They might have had more than that. Anyway, there was like 10 kids between these two women who were like, “We can totally take them camping.” And so we went to Swim, and we drove to Swim. And we got there. It was dark, and the bridge to get to wherever our campground was washed out from a flood. And so we could not get to the camera. And it was 8:30 at night. My mom and her friend had 10 kids. And so what did we do? My mom went into this neighborhood and knocked on a door, and asked the lady if we could camp in her backyard. And she said yes. That's the funny part of the story. The lady let us camp in her backyard. So, we legit put up our tents in the backyard. I remember this lady was so nice. And she like, “We like roasted s'mores.” And light her backyard on a fire. And she brought us breakfast the next morning, and she let us go to the bathroom, and brush her teeth in her house. Anyway, we ended up camping with all 12 of us in this lady's backyard. And that's my story about Sequim. It's like I still remember this crazy lady who let randos sleep in her backyard. I feel that's something that only happened back in the 80s. I wonder if people would even do that nowadays.

 

Amber B  6:13  

So that's my story–

 

Katie  6:13  

You can always camp in my backyard anytime.

 

Amber B  6:15  

Okay. Yeah, but I know you, right? She didn't notice Adam. She's like, “Who are these people?” Luckily, it was two moms with all of these little kids. Pretty sure they're not serial killers. But still, I still remember that experience. So that is my story. That is my memory. But it's associated with Sequim. And so when Katie told me she was going to Sequim, I told her that story. That's like my one Swim story. Okay, so now that we've taken a big, huge detour, let's lead the story back to you. So what made you sign up for Macros 101? And what were you struggling with at that point?

 

Katie  6:51  

Okay, so I did the September of 2020 round of Macros 101. So you can probably imagine the headspace that I was in living in Washington State during the pandemic. So, we still have not opened up for the most part. I was not in a great place. Let's see, I am certified for high fitness. No, I was certified as a group fitness instructor in 2018. And then shortly after I was certified as a high fitness instructor, and was just starting to teach group fitness classes. Was starting to get into a really good rhythm. I loved my classes. I was finally building up. There are only two high fitness instructors. I was the first one out here. And so we've basically been building it from scratch. And I finally had a job at the big gym here. I had a lot of people that were coming that were loving the class. We just– what was it? February of 2020. We did a no. I don't remember. Some Valentine's day class. We had a big valentine's day class. And so many people came and were so interested in the class and the world shut down. Yeah, it was February of 2020. So, I had one kid in kindergarten, my oldest son, he was in kindergarten at the time. And so my son has yet to have a full year of school. Until this year. So, I had both kids at home. No family out here. We live away from our family. We grew up in Utah. So it was just me and my kids. And my husband's dental office shut down for I think it was a month. And so he went back to work. Thank goodness. But yeah, it was rough. So, I had lost all of my classes. I also certified as a personal trainer in February of 2020. I had one client at the studio that I was working for which is a small studio run by a truly awesome badass trainer. She was just as hardcore as they come.We worked really well together. And I was finally in this really good groove and then it was gone. All of it was gone. And the studio that I was working for she ended up deciding to close her doors permanently. Offered to sell me the business but I was in no position at a brand new trainer to really buy a business and especially in the middle of a pandemic. To buy a small fitness studio was probably not the greatest investment at the time. So I did have to pass on it. And so she did decide to close her doors permanently in August of 2020. 

 

Katie  10:14  

So the headspace that I was in was not great. It was very isolating. I was depressed. I didn't have a gym to go to, which was my one outlet to basically keep me off medication, and had to get back on medication and started building up. Oh, let's see, no, we moved in October of 2020. We bought a new house. And I had told my husband that 100% deal breaker was if it didn't have a spot for a home gym, because I'm never doing this again. I'm never going without my workout space. And so it was kind of this really weird position in my life where I feel I've lost everything. Everything that was making me feel myself, other than just being a mom. I had lost all of it. And I had no control. There was just how I am not in control. Yeah, me and no control don't mix well together. So, it was just this really Aha Moment ‘cuz I've been following you forever. Like dapper.

 

Amber B  11:36  

You're like an OG.

 

Katie   11:37  

I am. Yeah.

 

Amber B  11:39  

Back in the day.

 

Katie  11:41  

I remember when you started Ditch the Diet. And I remember when it transitioned into Macros 101 and I still kick myself for not signing up in that first round. So, I had a business account, finally, that was separate from my personal account with my husband. And he was so gracious to allow me to do this and give me a decent amount of money to start with all that stuff to start my high fitness stuff. And I remember when you opened the doors to September 2020 Macros 101 and I looked at my business account. And there was the exact number of the price within my account. The money I had in my account. And I'm like, “Well, if that's not a sign.”– 

 

Amber B  12:34  

But it is…

 

Katie  12:35  

What is? So, I went for it. I was like, “If I'm going to do it, it's going to be now because I am in the worst mental space I've been in in a very long time. And it was just the right time. Everything fell into place. It was my time to do it.

 

Amber B  12:57  

Yeah, yeah. I love it. And I think so many people can relate to that experience of 2020. I think so many things that we thought we had control over, realized that it really was an illusion. We didn't really have control over it. And I think it's an important distinction that you didn't lose control. You realize that you never had control in so many areas that you felt you were in control of, right? And so I think that it's important to distinguish because it's not that we lost it. It's that we woke up to that realization that, “Oh, we have been sitting here thinking we've been in control. When in reality, it really is an illusion. And control really is an illusion. But it's a very common illusion that we tell ourselves “Oh, I got this,”, “I'm in control of all these things.” And then life is like, “No, you're not. Let me show you. Let me show you how I'm not in control of these things.” And then we have a lot of learning to do. So, one of the reasons I wanted to have you on the podcast is because I have seen such immense, immense, immense personal growth within you. I've gotten the pleasure to be able to work not only with you in Macros 101 and then in the coaching academy and then also in build your workouts and I've just seen such incredible growth in you. And so I want you to share from your experience what that has been like and maybe even if there are a couple or one breakthrough that you can kind of zero in on and talk through, what that what that experience has been for you and what triggered it and what that is made possible for you as you've had these leaps in your personal growth.

 

Katie  14:39  

Okay. So, kind of a funny story. I didn't feel I took full advantage of Macros 101 while it was running. So, I basically knew before the program ended that I was going to sign up for beyond because I didn't necessarily feel I was behind, but definitely didn't feel I was fully utilizing everything. Like there were some scheduling things where I could make all the calls. I felt I was slacking on the modules like all that stuff. So, it didn't all happen in Macros 101. And so I knew very early on that I would be setting up for Beyond. And I feel I have definitely had so many breakthroughs there. And then I think there's been a wall here. Two different sides. Where it's my personal growth and then my business growth, which they kind of lead over but in my own personal journey, some big ones happen and beyond where it was allowing myself to get stuck in this overwhelm, which comes into the control aspect, things that I feel like I should have control of and yet have none. And I let it affect my home life more than it needs to. So, trying to reset my priorities there and realizing what was actually happening was a really big moment for me. Realizing that I am allowing this to happen. This is not an outside source that is like, “No, you have to stop. You're done. You can't do anything.” Rain shuts down. No, that's me. I do that. No one else can make me do that. So, that was a big deal for me. Realizing how much my overwhelm from outside sources was really affecting my life, my children's life, my husband's life, how much I let it affect that. So that was probably one of the more recent breakthroughs that I had. And then in the Coaching Academy, it was kind of just that realization of, “If you don't get started with what you have now, you're never going to get started.” It's just not going to happen. You're going to constantly live in this fear. And you will allow it to take control. And you will never start where there is no special next certification. There is nothing past what you've already done. Except for more education, which is not a bad thing. But you can do that while you're working. 

 

Amber B  17:52  

And learning.

 

Katie  17:53  

Yeah, on actually doing it.

 

Amber B  17:56  

Yeah, yeah. And we've had this conversation because I saw this in Katie. And I see this in a lot of women is this need for permission that it's like, “If I get the next certification, then that'll be ready.” And then you get that and then you're like, “Oh, but I don't know everything. And so I need this next certification.” And this certification creeps in. And really what it is internally, is you have decided that you're not ready. And no amount of certifications is going to make you decide that you're ready. It really is a decision. It's a line in the sand that you have to draw and say, “Okay, I don't know everything. Guess what? I don't know everything either.” And at some point, you have to say, “But I do know something. And I know something more than somebody else. And is there someone else that can help right now while I am learning?” I think learning is great. I think we all should be learning more. I think we all should be taking more certifications and up-leveling ourselves. But what Katie is saying is so important is don't let that stop you from what you can do right now. And that's what I see a lot of women not wanting to make that decision to help now and so that I feel that's one of the biggest breakthroughs that I've seen in you is just that ability to say, “No, I'm going to make a decision that I'm ready now and I'm going to help who it is that I'm conserve and do at this point. And then we'll go from there.”

 

Amber B  19:24  

Okay, so changing focus a little bit, what some people listening may not know is that so you came into Macros 101, you went into Beyond, you also then went into Coaching Academy, which is where I teach coaches how to coach, and then while you were in there, we tapped you to come and be the coach inside of build your workouts. So, tell us what that experience was for you of taking that leap. So, what we wanted was we wanted a personal trainer who had been through my coaching academy so that they knew the way that I coached and they were very familiar with the brand and in how we run and represent the brand to come in and be the trainer inside of our build-your-workouts community to be able to provide help and assistance to people who have gone through that program. So, we tap Katie. We asked Katie if she wanted to do it, and she said, “Yes.” So, talk to us a little bit about that. What maybe were some of the fears that came up and what has that experience been for you?

 

Katie  20:24  

I remember it very vividly. I mean, it also wasn't that long ago. But I remember losing sleep. I lost a lot of sleep because I was so nervous. And I remember our quick little zoom call talking about it. I was like, “Okay, okay. That sounds awesome. Yeah, yeah, I want it.” And then as my nerves got the better of me leading up to it, and we were in a coaching academy doing around macros 101 during this transition of me doing it. And I remember the week the build-your-workouts launched and I was in the general coaching section in macros 101 to coach and I was like, “Okay, okay. This is fine. I'm not gonna die. That's just a lot.” Yes, yeah. But it was after that first initial week and the month. I felt it was a month or so for me to kind of really get into a flow with it. During the coaching for Macros 101 and doing build-your-workouts, and after about a month, I felt pretty well adjusted. And yeah, I was terrified. Legitimately terrified to do this. Lots of confidence issues in my abilities, and trying to come to terms with that where it was kind of the same thing where it's if you don't get started, it's never gonna happen. If you do not take this opportunity, what makes you think another one is gonna come along? That's not how your life works, Katie. So, I love being on this team. And it seemed an extremely natural progression for me. Yeah, that makes sense. And it has been so much fun for me. I have loved it and getting to know these women a little bit more through beyond and through Macros 101 and seeing them in the Build-your-workouts, and it's like, “Hey! It's so cool!”

 

Amber B  22:43  

It's so cool. Yeah, yeah. And I think one of my favorite things of being in the position and building the business that I've been able to build is seeing abilities in people before they see them in themselves. That's a really cool thing for me. And I saw that in you. I know that maybe you didn't have the same confidence in yourself, but I saw it in you. It knew it was there. And I identified it. And I was like, “It's there. She just has to realize that it's there.” And I knew it was gonna be a big ask. I knew it was going to terrify you. But I also knew that it was a way that you were going to be able to see that ability in yourself. And so that's always a really fun thing for me to spot things that people don't see in themselves. Giving them an opportunity to grow, and then step into that realization of, “Oh, I can do this. I am really good at this. Because, Katie, you're really good at it. You're great at coaching. Any of you guys who are in build-your-workouts in that community know that Katie knows her stuff. She knows her crap. She is good at coaching. And it's been so fun to see that, as a mentor, to be able to see that in you to kind of have you realize that, “Oh, yeah, I'm doing good at this. I'm awesome. I'm a good coach. That's really fun.” So, awesome. Well, I do want to wrap this up. So, if there's any last words that you have, or maybe words of advice, or if you could go back and tell yourself something maybe in August of 2020, what would you say to you a year and a half ago?

 

Katie  24:22  

Wow, a year and a half ago. Good things are coming. Good things are coming. Your life seems pretty good right now. And it's gonna get better. There are so many rewarding things that are coming from your hard work that you're putting in. To be a better person, to be a better coach, to be a better mom, be a better wife. It's coming.

 

Amber B  24:59  

And I think that I can apply to anybody who may feel they're in one of those seasons because I think we go through these seasons, and other people are gonna resonate with the season that you were in. And I think just that message of keep going. It's all working out. It's gonna work out, move forward, take that next step and just keep putting one foot in front of the other. It's an awesome message. Well, thank you so much, Katie, for coming on the podcast and sharing your story. 

 

Amber B  25:28  

I hope that you enjoyed that episode with Katie and were able to take something away that makes your life a little bit better. Makes you be able to take something, put it into action, and be able to move forward in reaching whatever goals that you have set for yourself. That wraps up this episode of Biceps after Babies Radio. I'm Amber, now go out and be strong because remember, my friend, you can do anything.

 

Outro

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