151: Drinking Alcohol and Counting Macros with Anna Crosby [“I Did It” Series]

Introduction 

You're listening to Biceps after Babies radio episode number 151.

Hello and welcome to Biceps after Babies radio. A podcast for ladies who know that fitness is about so much more than pounds lost or PRs. It's about feeling confident in your skin and empowered in your life. I'm your host, Amber Brueseke, a registered nurse, personal trainer, wife, and mom of four.  Each week, my guests and I will excite and motivate you to take action in your own personal fitness as we talk about nutrition, exercise mindset, personal development, and executing life with conscious intention. If your goal is to look, feel, and be strong and experience transformation from the inside out, you, my friend are in the right place. Thank you for tuning in, now let’s jump into today’s episode.

 

Amber B  0:48  

Hey, hey, hey, welcome back to another episode of biceps after babies radio. I'm your host Amber Brueseke. And today is another Friday episode where I bring you real stories from real women who have been through a fitness journey, have been through Macros 101 and have come out with, you know, transformation of all different shapes and sizes and sorts. And I have them come on the podcast and be able to share their story. And I think it's so powerful to learn from the stories of other people. And you know, I have my own story. And it's great, and it resonates with some people. But I also recognize at the same level that you may resonate more with somebody else's story. And so my intention really on these Friday episodes is they're short, they were going to bring a real woman on and we're going to let her talk and share what she's learned and what her aha moments have been and what's really made a difference in her journey. And so that's really exciting for me to want to bring on my Macros 101 clients and to be able to have these stories be shared, so that as you're listening, you can relate to these women and you can take some of their learnings and apply them to your journey. 

 

Amber B  1:58 

Now if you aren't on the waitlist yet for Macros 101, we are opening doors for the last time in 2021 on August 30. So if you want to be able to make sure that you don't miss enrollment, because it's only for a four day period, we only open doors for four days, make sure you get on the waitlist at bicepsafterbabies.com/waitlist. 

 

Amber B  2:20 

Now today, we have Anna Crosby on the podcast. And I really wanted to invite Anna on because during our last round of Macros 101, she came on one of our group coaching calls, and her and I just had a really amazing coaching conversation that was really shifted a lot for her, and also shifted a lot for a lot of the people that were listening, it was a really powerful experience of listening to her get close to something that she didn't even really know was there. And that's the experience that coaching can provide is we all struggle with blind spots, things that we don't know that we don't know, better, are there and are holding us back but we're not really cognitively aware of them. And that's one of the things that coaching can do. And so that was the experience that Anna had in this coaching call. And it really started to shift things for her in terms of her drinking, and the goals that she wanted to reach. And so, you know, this conversation, I hear a lot of questions about alcohol and macro counting and alcohol and goals. And can those two things coexist? And the answer is yes, they can coexist. And we, as you'll hear in the interview, we always want to be coming back to this idea of like, who's in control? Am I in control? Am I making choices that are aligned with the outcomes that I want to create? And if not, what needs to change in order to make that happen. So let's dive into the interview with Anna Crosby. 

 

Amber B  3:49

I am so excited to welcome Anna to the podcast. Anna, how are you doing? 

 

Anna  3:57  

Well, thanks. 

 

Amber B  3:58  

This is gonna be a good conversation. I am excited to bring you on because I think you have such an awesome story. And as we're going to talk about in this episode, an experience like a kind of a moment that we had a coaching call that just we were talking before we hit record of if not only did that shift some things for you. But we were just talking about how many people reached out to you and saying how much that really helped them in their journey. So we're gonna get into that. But I first want to just start out by asking you a little bit of where you're at on your journey. Maybe when you found me, when you found Macros 101, what was what was hard, like what felt hard before? What were you struggling with and kind of just lay out where you were at in your journey? 

 

Anna  4:42  

I feel like it's still hard, but…

 

Amber B  4:45  

Oh yeah. Yeah, it doesn't get easier, it gets different. I think that's a really important point is it just gets different right as different hearts.

 

Anna  4:54  

Yeah, it's the whole mindset shift that you hear so many people say. I feel like I had to go through every cliché to get where I am. Like, you start and you stop. And at first you start by trying to lose weight and the vain things and then you realize this isn't about losing weight. This is about a lifestyle change for the better and getting through your self sabotage, getting through your self doubts and all that stuff. 

 

Anna  5:27  

But how I started, or before I found you, I rarely use Instagram, like at all, but I love it because the best thing about Instagram is that you do have this potential to get influence and follow these people that can change your life, if you continue to do like kind of give advice and take advice and stuff like that. So I like to get on there and follow food recipes and fitness stuff and stuff that I aspire to do, but don't know how to do. So it's kind of like an interactive Google, you know. 

 

Anna  6:09  

Back when the pandemic first happened, my brother got diagnosed with brain cancer in May 2020. And we rushed down to see him in July, because they live in North Carolina. And because you never know with this kind of diagnosis, like, it gives you a life expectancy. And they tell you like you could live a long healthy life or, you know, things could get worse. And so we rushed down there in July. And prior to that, I've always been like, I need to lose weight, I need to get my body back from being a mom, etc. And I tried a bajillion plans. Like, I could list off like 10 different plans I've tried. And so but when I got down there, and I just took a picture with my brother, and I'm like, this might be my last picture with him. And I was like, I don't want to like, I know it's vain of me, but I don't want to look awful, or in my eyes like, I don't want this to be like the image that I have with him. You know how some people share Memorial pictures of, you know, if someone was lost at that young age or something, and I just didn't want that. So I went home, and I just ended this food program, it was ridiculously expensive, and I didn't lose any weight. And I'm like, Alright, I'm gonna hire this coach. She lost her gym not completely but it was shut down to her in the heart of New York, during the pandemic, and they just had too many restrictions. And so she started teaching online classes, and it was $100 a month, but I was like, money kind of motivates me later, and a little bit on this program, then I'm probably gonna stick with it. And I was sticking with it and it was really tough, like, but they were alive. And I was doing it with the group. And I was building my endurance, but I wasn't seeing any body changes. And I'm like, this is the part that I hate. It's the stuff that you do off camera, the stuff that you do off the training in the kitchen and so I'm like, I need to do something. 

 

Anna  8:32 

So I actually found another macro coach on my who was doing an eight week challenge. And I signed up for that. And I was seeing body composition change. But I was like she didn't give us the like the science behind it or like there wasn't Oh, the cookbook or anything, it was kind of like here's an eight week meal plan or it was like one week and then you can like variate like change it up or whatever and like I just kind of felt like I was doing the things that was you know, given to me but outside of that I didn't know how to like live my life outside of that. So I like drinking on the weekends. Like yeah, whatever just factor that into so I don’t eat  lunch or something. And then I was just you know getting bored of the same food on that one week meal plan that the holidays came because that started in like the fall and went to the holidays and then I just like went right back to I didn't like I saw results but no before and after is ever those like weird before and after's where they're like here's my pant size and I even fit a person or two in here like you're expecting to like be shredded and ripped and I was making progress but Like I couldn't even see it in myself, because I was just like, nothing shifted in my life for me.

 

Amber B 10:07  

Yeah, it's such a good point that you bring up this idea of like, you know, maybe a physical transformation or physical shift. But when it's not accompanied by the internal shift, it doesn't last. And I see that over and over and over again of people who can stick to a plan. And I think a lot of women are actually really good at sticking to some sort of meal plan or diet plan or exercise plan for a period of time and they're really good at that. And they've, they've learned to be really good at that. But when nothing shifts, internally, then what happens after that, you go back to your former life, right? You go back to how you were eating before, what you were doing before, and it doesn't create that permanent transformation. Because you hit the nail on the head, like nothing has actually shifted internally, you don't understand it, you don't have to adapt it for your long term life, you can do it really well and be really strict for a while. And then everything falls apart. So walk us through what made you sign up for macros one on one, what was like what seemed different about that, that made you say, hey, let's try this next.

 

Anna  11:14  

I did the five day like free things, which I did and I love, I could just listen to you all day. You give great like you just always say coaching is your superpower. And it really is because you can just literally talk to somebody and just help them change their life. And they didn't even expect that like in our coaching calls. I didn't even know I had all that up in there. So I knew I wanted to be coached by you and would like to try it. But one of the best things I liked about it was you offered it. It's like a lifetime access. And like, I figured, even if I feel like I've done so many programs, at least I can go back to it. And it's like something that I can utilize. And like it's not a diet program, you definitely tell people that it's not a diet program. It's a lifestyle change. And so that's why I kind of signed up for that. I was like, Well, I can, I always have the resources. And I've always been a Resource Based person like I like, I'm one of those people that I go to college with if I could afford to just go just learn.

 

Amber B  12:25  

Yeah, I love that. Yeah. So we did, you and I had a really good coaching call. And you know, you had mentioned just before this that like sometimes things come up that you didn't necessarily know, was there. Right? That's, that's part of like, the power of coaching is like a coach can help you see things that maybe you didn't see in yourself. So what was it about that coaching call that really started, like sort of that shift for you?

 

Anna  12:55  

I think that I was in denial, so in our culture, drinking is like, very normalized. And I was just normalizing drinking and not owning it and not reflecting on how it like sabotages all of my workouts and all of the eating progress that I've made and all of the like, Oh, yeah, like Weight Watchers, you can just factor in your wine, you know, or macros, you can just factor it in, but you don't factor in how much it like sabotage is your anxiety and your mental health. And then like, I wasn't overeating, under-eating or not getting my macros. It was like I factored it in but like it didn't really process like how much I was losing out on proteins and the healthy whole and stuff like that. And just didn't realize how much I didn't need it either and like how did it go. It's kind of like when you have your favorite tree for people that don't drink, you know, like, you can factor in the ice cream of you if you want but is that really helping you like it's like a crutch. So I think that like it was something I needed a roadblock I needed to like self discovery for myself and like where I can be honest with myself, like where I was with it. Because a lot of people, you know, look at me and they're like, you don't have a drinking problem. Like I know I don't have a problem. But it is a problem when it's like not letting me hit my goals and like, because that's one of the biggest things that we owe to ourselves is to set goals and reach them and be the person that we want to be and if that if I can't hit them while drinking because I'm not losing weight and I need to let it go.

 

Amber B  14:53  

Yeah. Do you remember what your question was when you came onto the call? I don't even recall. I hope you remember.

 

Anna  15:00  

I didn't really have a question. I, 

 

Amber B  15:03  

Those are sometimes the best, I actually kind of like that sometimes when people like, I don't really have a question. I'm like, Okay, cool. We're gonna, like we're gonna get there. We're gonna get to your question.

 

Anna  15:10  

I felt like a failure because I purchased this expensive program. And then I kind of gave up all of March because I was working on some business goals of mine. And I put the macros on the side, I stopped working out because I was like, I'm going to focus on the nutrition piece. And so then I just felt lost, like how do I reverse now? How do I cut? I've been in a cut. And then well, I've been all over the place. And it was more like helping me with the next step. My initial question is like, where do I go?

 

Amber B  15:45  

Yeah. And one of the things that I love the best about coaching. You know, one of the analogies I use in terms of like, what coaching can really be like is that a lot of times, it's like, you're when you're in a dark room, and you can't really see anything, and then somebody turns on the lights, and you're able to finally see the cockroaches that have always been there, right? The cockroaches were always there in the room, but the light was off, and we didn't see the cockroaches. And so a coach can come along and kind of turn on the light. And you can see the cockroaches in the alley like, Oh my gosh, there's cockroaches, and now we can get rid of the cockroaches. And so that was kind of the experience that I had with Anna was that she came on with this question of like, you know, I feel like a failure. I feel like I purchased this program. And I haven't actually done it. And you know, where do I go from here? Like that was the question. But where we ended up getting to was a very different conclusion than you thought you were coming on to get coached about. And it was like that moment where the lights got turned on. And you were like, Oh, crap, I had no idea that this was even there. And so we got into the drinking, and the experience that you had had with drinking. And you were the one who said, like, I need to stop. Like that was not me that said, girlfriend, you need to stop. You were the one who said it. Why did you come to that conclusion? Like Where? What was that switch like you came into it? Drinking every week, every weekend, right? It was a weekend thing for you. Every weekend. And on the call had the switch to be like I need to let this go. Where did that come from?

 

Anna  17:17  

Just like walking it through. Like, why am I doing this and where is it getting me? Well, none of my friends or family think I have a problem. Everyone's doing it. Why can I do it too? But I think this switch was just like acknowledging that I'm doing it and I'm not even enjoying it. And then like later, I'm beating myself up for it again, it was that mental shift for me of like, why I just did it to do it because it's a habit or like socially acceptable, or everybody else is doing it. And then Monday comes around and I'm back to square one and I'm beating myself up. And nobody talks about it like it's depressive. It's not like everyone thinks it's like oh, you get drunk and it's a good time or it's like 20 minutes of that and then it kicks in metabolically to be like a depressant and so I actually been playing around since that I did like 42 to 50 days I don't remember of non drinking and just kind of played like, went on date nights which is really weird. Like, we usually go out to dinner and have a drink and as we have small children we don't get to do that often. So we just kind of let loose and my husband did that and I'm like that's fine and he was like loving that he had a DD and you know all the all the things and then like hanging out with friends and stuff and it was like an experiment for me. I found out that I do like drinking with my husband because he knows me. He knows my philosophies on life and he knows my heart and how I am but I don't like drinking anymore around people I don't know because it is that anxiety clicking in and when you stop for a while like one is like can be such a trigger.

 

Amber B  19:18  

Yeah, yeah. And as you know, I think it's really important to interject here that like what neither Anna nor I are saying is that you shouldn't drink at all right or that like if you want to hit your goals you have to stop drinking that that's not the message here. But I think that message is a great one in that we can and should be re-evaluating. Is this something that is serving me? Is this something that's actually helping me? Is it something that I'm just defaulting to having like this habit? Or like this is what I do on the weekends? Is it something that actually makes me feel good in the long run? And if it's not doing an experiment like trying to cut it out, I remember Anna on that call. You were like yeah, I'm gonna give up alcohol for the next little while. And then I remember you posted in the group like that you had been like 30 days hadn't touched alcohol. And giving yourself that experiment of feeling what it feels like is, you know, how do I want to have this work for me. And that's what it sounds like you found you found a way for it to work for you, instead of just being a default, or just being like something that you don't actually think about. It's like a decision that you've made like, this is how I want to live my life. This is how I want to include it in my plan and this is what's going to work for me, and I think that that is available to everybody. And maybe it's alcohol for you who's listening, maybe it's something else. But making sure what you are doing is a choice that you're actively making, and that it's something that's really serving you in the long run. Do you feel like that's an accurate representation? Like giving up pizza? 

 

Anna  20:47  

Yeah, I have learned through this experience of this new health and fitness journey of mine that everything is like an experiment. And alcohol is just part of that. Just like giving up pizza. It's literally or giving up chocolate or I started eating a ton of chocolate the month I gave up alcohol. And I'm like, What am I doing? It's like literally one device for the next device, like,

 

Amber B  21:16  

replacing it. Yeah,

 

Anna  21:18  

yes. And you just need to like, give yourself time and adjust. So then the next month, I was like, Okay, I did no alcohol this month. I'm going to do no candy this month. And you know, and it's just forward progression, but it's slow. And it's better than going backwards.

 

Amber B  21:37  

Yeah. Yeah. And you had mentioned at the beginning that it's still hard. Like it doesn't necessarily like oh, everything clicks and it's like magic. And it's like, Oh, it's so easy now. Right? There's still things to work on.

 

Anna  21:52  

Zero weight if you give up alcohol. Yeah. Like, what, two months? Almost? Like no alcohol, and I am not losing weight. Like, yeah, for me.

 

Amber B  22:06  

And we can also say, maybe you didn't lose weight. But what other things did you gain from that experience?

 

Anna  22:11  

Exactly. No, I want to take it back. And I definitely have a new found way of living with alcohol in our lives. I have only drunk like twice since that. And like one of it one time that was just like a beer like one beer came in. I've never been that person that just has no insulin, like gave me a headache or something. But then one time, we went away to Maine, and we just had a nice couples weekend. And it was just like champagne all weekend. So just like, I'd like that I feel like I'm in control of what I can consume. It doesn't even matter if it's alcohol or not. I'm in control of how I want my body to feel and how I want to feel and what I want to consume. And everything is supposed to be in moderation no matter what it is. And other than water you can over water.

 

Amber B  23:12  

Totally Yeah. And I think you hit the nail on the head, like at the end of the day, it is that you're in control, and that you get to make a choice, and making sure that we are actually actively making choices. And I think for you, you know, correct me if I'm wrong, but it seems like alcohol and stopped becoming a choice and just became something that you just did without even really thinking about it. And when we can bring it back into that place of like actually actively making the decision. And sometimes the decision is yes, I'm going to have some champagne with my husband on a weekend like that can be the active decision. There's nothing wrong with that. And sometimes it's like you know, I'm at a party and I'm with other people and I don't really want to drink right now and you can actively make that decision but when you step into that position of power in your life to be able to make a decision and have it be within your control. That's really the ultimate of like feeling that power that you have inside of you to make decisions so I love that you have found that place yourself

 

Anna  24:10  

I don't know if I would have found that if I didn't have that coaching call that would have been. Then maybe another eight months and struggling to the next program

 

Amber B  24:19  

Yeah, and that's because we all have cockroaches that we cannot see. And like every all of us we all have blind spots that we can't see which is why it's so powerful to be able to have somebody on the outside kind of like flip on the lights and point them out for us because then you can start to work through it and you can start to do that work and you did right that's what I I'm so proud of you for like actually doing that work. But yeah, how are you going to see that without having a little bit of help? And anybody else who was on that call? Anna said she had a couple people reach out to her. I've had people mention to me of how powerful that call was to watch Anna get coached through this like aha moment that she didn't realize was there. And I think that's the power of group coaching of being able to witness somebody else, go through a coaching process that then you can start to apply to yourself. And so you know that was a really powerful call I was really proud of, of you for showing up in a really, really big way. And I'm just so excited for the shifts that you've had that you've started to make your life.

 

Anna 25:20  

Yeah, I rather be asked that's my other, Nemesis is like an open book when you could just be real. And I forget some people do love hiding that. And they're not all like me. And I'm like, why would someone do something like this or that? Because they're just not, you know, they don't wear their heart on their sleeve or they don't. They're just not open. And so this whole adulting thing, nobody tells you.

 

Amber B  25:50  

Nobody tells you. Yes, yeah. So awesome. Well, is there anything, any last minute like takeaways that you would love to share with somebody who is listening to this episode?

 

Anna  26:03  

Of a fight like, the clichés work, so do them. Start tracking your food, I've been told that for years, track your food, like you have to know what you're consuming. I was under consuming food to compensate for alcohol, which was horrible. I probably don't have enough protein and probably wasn't getting enough fat for my hormones, and, etc. Actually, I love that. And then, like, go from one cliché to the next cliché. So if someone says like, take the measurements, I think pictures are very hard to do. And they do show progress. And I'm glad I have my own. I wouldn't share them but I have my own.

 

Amber B  26:52  

You have them. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, that's really, really good. Well, awesome. Thank you so much for coming on and sharing your story, Anna. 

 

Anna  27:00  

You're so welcome. I hope that helps. 

 

Amber B  27:03  

I hope that you got a lot out of that interview with Anna. I'm really just grateful for her being willing to share her struggles and some of the things that have helped her as she's worked through this, I'm really proud of her for making hard choices and not just going with the grain and what society says or what you know, habit has been but really starting to make decisions based off of what she wants to create in her life. And that same opportunity is available to you to be in that place where you're in control and you're making decisions based off of your outcomes the outcomes that you desire to create in your life. 

 

Amber B  27:37 

If you are not yet on the waitlist for macros 101 head to bicepsafterbabies.com/waitlist and get on the waitlist, we open up doors August 30. And if you want to be able to have the experience of being coached through your journey, that is the place to do it. So  bicepsafterbabies.com/waitlist.  That wraps up this episode of biceps after babies radio. I'm Amber, now go out and be strong because remember my friend you can do anything.

 

Outro

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